The Idea of You

rainy day man

The past is history for a reason and it should remain as such. It’s not just HIS story, but it’s HER story as well as OUR story. How one may want to go back and rectify events or change things and alter what could have been lies in the deep desire to improve on life. What we do now can never change what happened in the past. One can’t revisit emotions and live them as they were. Nor can one do something today to make it right for yesterday. It just does not work that way. In fact, you may be working to do more harm than good. You can’t examine and make things right with what went wrong. What went wrong or happened in the past changed destiny today. It made you who you are and what you have become today with a life defined by a series of actions from those moments and steps in the past. You wove the story with the threads in your tapestry. They just had to be interwoven in the right places to bring forth an image. It was meant to happen exactly that way. Playing around and trying to go back and change things for the better sometimes may lead to problems. Meaning, if we try to reconnect with people from our past and rectify all the things that went wrong, it may just not work out in the way we may envision or in our favor. We may have good intentions, but the outcome may not be beneficial in the long run. It may cause more pain, more sorrow than it’s worth. So we certainly should do things with some foresight and less impulsiveness in our enthusiasm to be the good guy and right an old wrong. Trying to be a good person sometimes backfires if taken the wrong way. We might find that our stained glass windows are a bit dusty, smudged with soot accumulated from the years traversed. When we try and wipe the dust off, the image of the person who reappears in our life may have changed with time. The one who looks back may have traces of gray hair, may have added a few pounds here and there, may have some lines around the mouths and eyes, but we still see the youth and the charm. We fail to see that time has etched struggles, pain, worry lines or has given wisdom, maturity, depth to thoughts that were perhaps idealistic and romantic in the past.Time not only may add years to the appearance, but may add unanticipated characteristics and qualities to a person today that we do not want to acknowledge exist. Do we really want to blemish the shiny gloss that coats the windows of the past? “Let sleeping dogs lie” is an apt phrase, because if you wake the sleeping dog, it may rise up to tell you it may not like the person you’ve become today and may not be able to say it kindly without causing some pain. Sometimes it’s “the idea of a you” that tugs at my heart strings, the “you” that made my heart melt, the “you” that gave attention to every whim and thought of mine, the “you” that made the “me” in me feel extremely special, but that “you” does not want to remain for “me” today.

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